Then, the following week I was talking to my sister-in-law, Sarah, about wanting a baby so dang bad. She said something along the same lines (less radical!) but still that above all else I need to want Christ. Yep, even more than I want a baby. Of course, she offered lots of support along with it, but that is what stood out the most to me. That, is the point Jesus is trying to make in my life.
Seems to be a theme the last couple of weeks. Just looking back at those days just two weeks ago and hearing the same message from two different places (and Sarah goes to a different church, so she didn't hear it at Zion) makes me again see Christ at work in my life.
This last week, I have had a peace. No, I am not hating everyone and everything in my life, I am simply spending as much time (and hopefully more) praying, begging, etc. for a stronger faith as I am for a baby. Wow, what a difference it makes.
I wasn't sure about sharing all of this because I never want to offend or step on anyone's toes. But, I realized that a few months ago it was really clear how God was opening doors for us. Everything seemed to fall into place and it was clear to see Jesus working in my life. These days, as things have been more of a struggle, it was so nice to see God still working in me through others. It was just a reassurance that whether I like it or not, I am right where I am supposed to me. God has a plan for my life and He is teaching me while He comforts me. Talk about having peace.
....Now if only THIS season of waiting could be over...